YOU WERE IN LOVE WITH THE MOMENT AND NOT WITH ME.

It was that one-summer-love that merely happened on Winter. She met a "summer guy" on a cold breeze of a solitary night; they uttered their first hellos in a long time. 

The last time I wrote a blog about love and heartbreak, it was the latter. I guess poets tend to write their hearts out when they're in blues. 

She was drowning in too much happiness that she forgot to jot down every butterfly she felt. Now guess what's up? She was hurt. Again. It felt like a first heartbreak; maturely, disappointment. 

It was that one-summer-love that merely happened on a winter. She met a "summer guy" on a cold breeze of a solitary night; they uttered their first hellos in a long time. Remember the article The Love We Think We Deserve? That was written and felt a year ago. She strongly moved on from that; guarded her heart with bricks of an indestructible wall but still managed to care and to show love. -- Until then she knew she was ready to love again, but little did she know, she wasn't cautious for a heartbreak. 

She could still remember the smell of the tea they once shared. It was bitter-sweet but calming. Just like the actions he spoke towards her for the rest of the days. She was vulnerable and her heart is bare. She gave that moment a chance because she felt the serenity in the same air they breathe. He was her chill pill. She knew it. Her ocean of melancholy was flashed away from the shore; just like how her heart whispers, feel the love once more. She can't tell that what they had was love. Maybe he was just lonely the moment they accidentally met in a shop who sells cold tea. On the other hand, maybe she was just too happy that once again someone cared for her in glee. He wasn't her ideal guy but she thought he was the right soul who doesn't meet the eye. Through his (sincere) actions, she can tell how he cares. Who would do such efforts for a rebound girl? Why would he give mix signals to a girl who can't read between the lines? Why did you leave as soon as you came? Why did you say Hello when you don't know how to say Goodbye? She seeks for answers to her whys though she knows that she can't get any. It's like waiting for a flower to bloom in Winter. Impossible but hopeful. Nonetheless, she was aware that they have nothing to build together; but they were once so happy to sing-along with his acoustic playlist on a starry-night road trip. The memories were peeking out -- how her cheeks turned red when he held her hand in the front seat of his car. Their sweet giggles in awe while viewing the last episode of a rom-com series. That was majestic.They're in fleeting bliss. Everything remains a mystery and what they have was history. 

She won't ask for any explanations. Everything's now clear to her. She's a wildflower who grew in a wonderful world and was randomly picked by a coward passerby who's afraid to commit and let her die instead. But then again, she's a wildflower; she aesthetically grows back freely. 

To that one summer-guy: Don't waste a hopeless romantic girl's feeling ever again. Don't play guessing games because you're too old for that sh*t. Fall in love with the soul as hard as you fall for the moment. You were once her cup of infused peppermint tea, but she guessed it's best when brewed.

p.s I guess you were in love with the moment and not with me. I am that she.